Book Review: "Interrupted" by Jen Hatmaker

{I know this is too late to add to the link-up, but I promised a review and here I am working on the delivery. Please go read Jen's own words and then everyone else's words, but more importantly, read the book.}

God has perfect timing, ya know? A year ago, I would have read this book, smiled, and put it aside. What a nice little book. But this year?

After my church has completely changed directions and styles and methods? After I've read Jesus Feminist by Sarah Bessey, which completely shifted my entire brain? After reading Jen's book 7: An Experimental Mutiny Against Excess and having my world totally rocked? After watching so many tragedies take place around the world and at home... I'll say it again: God's timing is perfect. {And I apologize for not blogging about any of these subjects extensively/at all - some things are too tender for words.}

Interrupted is a cool glass of water that doesn't appear to be that appetizing until you start drinking and realize how gosh darn thirsty you actually are. For me, the second half of the book was better than the first. Jesus calls us to share the Good News {Matthew 25}, and that Good News is detailed in Isaiah 58:6-12.

Is not this the fast that I choose:

to loose the bonds of wickedness,

to undo the straps of the yoke,

to let the oppressed go free,

and to break every yoke?

Is it not to share your bread with the hungry

and bring the homeless poor into your house;

when you see the naked, to cover him,

and not to hide yourself from your own flesh?

Then shall your light break forth like the dawn,

and your healing shall spring up speedily;

your righteousness shall go before you;

the glory of the Lord shall be your rear guard.

Then you shall call, and the Lord will answer;

you shall cry, and He will say, "Here I am."

If you take away the yoke from your midst,

the pointing of the finger, and speaking wickedness,

if you pour yourself out for the hungry

and satisfy the desire of the afflicted,

then shall your light rise in the darkness

and your gloom be as the noonday.

And the Lord will guide you continually 

and satisfy your desire in scorched places

and make your bones strong;

and you shall be like a watered garden,

like a spring of water whose waters do not fail.

And your ancient ruins shall be rebuilt;

you shall raise up the foundations of many generations;

you shall be called the repairer of the breach,

the restorer of streets to dwell in.

{ESV}

Reviews are hard to write when you want to quote the whole book, so instead I will tell you that a) I will be re-reading this book again and again, and b) you should read this book, too. Jen is so real and authentic, and I know that she is writing out of real, broken, hard-earned revelation. I laughed, cried, and sat stunned all in the same chapter {and it happened almost every chapter}. Go read it - that's my review. 

Decisions, Decisions

Life is full of decisions. As Jen from Conversion Diary points out {check out Lesson 5}, sometimes we need a break from making decisions. Unfortunately, I'm not in a season where break-taking is an option. The past several days felt like this:

via

Which doula certification program do I choose? Which doula book should I read next? When should I start the next course? Should I start babysitting more so I can more quickly afford the doula workshop?

Where should I work while I'm getting certified? Do I stay in my current industry or switch? Who is going to be my new flatmate, since Samara is off on a new adventure? Do I stay in this area or move? 

When am I going to do laundry? How often does the floor need vacuumed? Is it time to run the dishwasher yet? How many times in a row can I have cereal for dinner!?

via

Things have gotten a little crazy in my head, as evidenced by the slew of questions that are taking way more brain power than necessary. Last night, the only decision I wanted to make was "Can I finish another episode of 'The Office' before I have to leave?" 

I'm feeling better today. The decisions are still looming, but the stress level has decreased. I don't know if it was crying {check} or talking with Samara {check} and AJ {check} or simply a good night's sleep {um, not check}, but things are looking better today. God is in control. He already knows my life's story, so I'm going to keep clinging to Him and asking Him for direction.  

Doula Adventure: Step One

Remember back in January when everyone was saying, "Man, 2013 was hard!" and everyone said "Golly, I think 2014 is going to be a GO year." Since Ash Wednesday, I think, we've been in a season of "suddenlies." As in, "suddenly" I realized that birth is my passion and I want to become a doula. 

The process of becoming DONA-certified is a pretty intense one. There are several books and papers that must be read, classes attended, so many hours must be spent observing, and a multitude of resources must be collected. It is, at best, daunting. DONA gives deadlines of two and four years; obviously, this is not an overnight process.

Six nights, however, can start something new. 

The first step that requires a specific timeframe is a childbirth class. There are a myriad of classes you can choose from, as long as the instructor is certified and there is at least 12 hours of class time. So on Monday, I began frantically enthusiastically emailing some local Bradley, Lamaze, and Birthing From Within instructors. A couple people responded, I'd get really excited and email them back, and then I'd hear nothing; NOTHING. Samara will attest to how frustrated I was getting. So finally I decided to call. And I got in the class. For less than half of what she usually charges. For the class series that starts on Tuesday. 

Let me reiterate: On Wednesday, I enrolled in a childbirth class that starts on Tuesday. 

SUDDENLY, I'm taking the first step to becoming a certified doula. Wow. 

Finish This: Week Twenty-one

Linking up with Becky at The Java Mama, Lisa at Coastlined, Jen at The Arizona Russums, and Nicole at Three 31. Hop on over for some link-up fun!

The best mistake I ever made was not working seriously on my college application during Christmas Break, 2007. Because of my slacker habit, my application was rushed and probably sloppy and unimpressive. I did not get accepted as a freshman to our big university, so I went to the community {now full-fledged} college a couple miles from my home. It ended up being the best possible thing, because from that community college, I transferred to Berea College and I know that's exactly where God wanted me.

From this mistake, I learned that God's plans are so much better than mine, and that I can only see a teensy piece of His plans at a time. When I was working on my application in 2007, I never would have imagined myself going to a small school in the middle of Kentucky. I couldn't have foreseen the amazing relationships I'd forge with my bosom friend and my roomie and others. I wouldn't have believed you if you told me that in 2012, I'd cry many, many hot tears as I left part of my heart in Kentucky. And I would have laughed if you told me about all the crazy trips I'd take to visit friends and the trips they'd take to visit me. The moral of the story is, God's plans are WAY cooler than mine :)

When I'm anxious, I tell myself that God is sovereign and He's working everything out, and hey, remember that I don't know everything. Also, I text/chat/talk to my bestie, and then I go to Zumba class, because that makes everything better.

All I really want to do is oh boy. More details coming in the career vein. I'd love to be able to travel instantaneously, like Dorothy - click my heels, and bam! Not in Kansas, but Kentucky! Or Europe, or Mexico, or anywhere. I really want chocolate to become a calorie-burning superfood. I really want to pierce my nose, but only if I could take it out and have the hole be invisible. Sometimes nose piercings just don't fit the situation, so if I could have the advantages of both the piercing and non-piercing, that'd be bomb.
I must have interpreted this question as "what do you wish was invented?" so let me give you a few that aren't fictitious. I really want to read, all. the. time. I really want to call my friends {or better, travel to see them!} way more frequently than time commitments allow. I really want to vacuum out my car {hey, that might actually happen soon!}. I really want to hold babies {this should be happening soon, once I go through volunteer training at the hospital}.

There you have it! Join the link-up with your own post, or answer the prompts in the comments. See you next week!

NAS: Religious Life

Linking up with Jen at Jumping in Puddles and Morgan at Follow and Believe!

While most of us feel called to marriage, it is important to see the beauty in all vocations! If/when you were discerning religious life, which communities interest{ed} you? What do you see as the positives of that vocation?

Tempted to pull out the Protestant card for 200, but I'm going to hunker down and respond to this prompt as best as I can because we've all had The Question strike: what if I stay single to infinity and beyond???

When I was a kid, this question didn't really bother me; in fact, I don't think I ever asked myself this question. In my mind, I knew I was going to grow up, get married, have a daughter named Jessie and a collie named Lassie, and teach ballet lessons. Done and done.

Except not.

When I was in high school, The Question started whispering to me, especially in youth group. So many times I got the impression that God wouldn't let me get married until I was completely happy staying single for the rest of my life. And that scared the living daylights out of me, because I wanted to get married and didn't want to stay single, and if God knows my innermost thoughts, He'd know if I was faking happiness. So obviously I was doomed to be single.

via

Some of these ideas stayed with me through college, but part of me realized that relationships, not just marriage, take a lot of work and that college wasn't the right time for me to jump on that train. So I learned to be really content by myself, and to rejoice with my friends, even when the diamonds on their hands sparkled more than the diamonds on mine {because diamonds from your parents are guaranteed to have less sparkle than one from a TDH, especially when all your friends are paying attention}. But with my awesome roomie and wonderful friends, I was able to shush The Question for the time.

via

And now I've been out of school for 2 years and life is whirring at 75 mph and God is taking me all different directions and when I catch my breath and The Question catches me, I usually have an answer. If I stay single to infinity and beyond, it will be okay. I will probably just keep doing what I'm doing, working, volunteering, being with friends and family and church family, watching "The Office" and reading lots of books, cooking new foods, making blogging friends {like you, readers!}, and loving Jesus. My life won't end if my marriage never starts, and I think that's the answer to the untwisted version of The Question that has been chasing me all these years.

The Question may sneak around some more, but instead of listening to it, I'm going to keep living life with Jesus. To infinity and beyond.

This Is Real Life

Last week, Holy Week, felt like Completely Unholy Week. Thank God it's over and that He is risen!

There were really only two factors that made last week hard: work and my health. On Monday, I was sitting at work, at the very desk where I'm currently sitting, and I had a revelation. I hate my current job. Yep.

For some background: I work for my parents, and last year when I started working for them full-time, I was worried and stressed and freaking out because I didn't completely know what I was doing or love what I was doing, but I didn't want to disappoint my parents, and if I didn't love this, how on earth would I get another job ever in my life??? Thankfully, my parents eased my fears by assuring me that not working for them was indeed an option; my friend Laurie reminded me that transitions take about a year to get fully adjusted, and so I relaxed. One might even say I flirted with apathy.

On Monday, it hit me: I hate this. I cannot continue sitting at a desk staring at a computer. I need human interaction. Suddenly, I was both so relieved and so frustrated! Relief washed over me because I knew that I didn't have to stay in this job. Frustration filled me because now that I've had this revelation, I have to have some patience before anything changes.

The good news is, Dad and I have talked about me doing something different, and on Wednesday, we had that conversation. And that's that. He's going to make some phone calls and I'm holding onto patience while the ball s-l-o-w-l-y starts rolling. I'm so thankful for a father and boss who are understanding and who want me to succeed.

via

Part Two: health challenges.

Both for my dignity and for you weak stomachs out there, I'm going to give you just the highlights of my health roller coaster: doctor's appointment, antibiotics, missing work, working from home, learning that when meds say "take with food" they really mean "take with food so you don't feel nauseous and puke at work," a trip to the ER, and more antibiotics. Ta da!

I find myself laughing at God's sense of timing, because the very week I realize that I hate sitting in front of this computer all day is the same week that antibiotics and ER visits keep me home for about half of my working hours. Thank You, God, for pulling me out of the office right when I needed it most.

To end on a light and fluffy note, I went to my favorite bull's-eye store on Saturday and splurged on some a-freaking-mazing pink nail polish for Easter. So thankful He is risen indeed.

Blog Every Day Feb: Day Sixteen - A Hard Lesson

Linking up with Bailey Jean for the February challenge!

I am not perfect. I am going to fail. Failure is not the end of the world. Failure does not affect God's love for me.

via

This multifaceted lesson has taken me most of my life to learn, and even now sometimes I have to stop and remind myself that I'm still learning and that I need to practice what I've learned.

There's no brilliant story of a great revelation or a giant screw-up with tears and restoration. This lesson took me several years to fully accept, and even now sometimes I fall back into old patterns of thinking. What has changed over the years is how quickly I remember that God's love for me doesn't change, and that lesson is worth every screw-up.

Sixty-one

61 years ago today, my grandparents got married. My grandpa was from Tennessee and came out to Washington with the Army when he was 17. My grandma was born in Canada, raised in Pennsylvania, and came out to Washington for a job. They met at church where they were both serving the youth group.

wedding party

A few years later, they had a couple kids.

Grandpa + Grandma with my dad and aunt

Quite a few years later, they renewed their vows for their 40th anniversary.

hooray for 40 years!

Grandma and Grandpa embodied sacrificial love, and not just for each other or for their family; they opened up their house countless times to strangers, cousins, church family, visiting pastors, missionaries, in addition to having each of their granddaughters spend the night frequently.

5 granddaughters at Easter

As many of you know, my grandpa passed away last March. He suffered from Alzheimer's for the past several years, and as my family prepared for him to go to Jesus, one of my prayers was that he would live to see his 60th anniversary; I'm so grateful to God that he did and that my grandparents were able to have a little celebration with family.

Although Grandpa is not on earth to celebrate their anniversary, I want to recognize and honor the 60 years that he and Grandma invested in each other, in their kids, in their 5 granddaughters and 2 great-grandchildren, in their neighborhood, their church, and countless other people who had the privilege to meet them. 

Grandpa, I know you're celebrating with Jesus right now, and I miss you like crazy. Thank you for loving and honoring Grandma for your whole married life.  

Grandma, I can't imagine this first anniversary without Grandpa, but I thank you for loving Grandpa faithfully and well. I love you!

Christmas 2011

Not Alone Series: What I Know Now

Linking up with Jen at Jumping in Puddles and Morgan at Follow and Believe for the Not Alone Series!

What would you tell your former self about being single if you had the chance? What have you learned that you wish you could tell your younger self?

To make things consistent, I'm just going to pick an age and address my younger self at that age. 19-year-old Bek, here's what I wish you knew:

I wish you knew that you are fearfully and wonderfully made and that not just any guy {as my dad would say, "we don't want someone just converting oxygen into carbon dioxide!"} is worth your time, effort, or thoughts. There will be guys who are cute, guys who are kind, guys who love Jesus, and guys who convert oxygen into carbon dioxide. You are worth more. Enjoy being friends with guys, but hold your horses and wait for God's best.

I wish you knew that you can be honest with your girl friends. You're all fighting similar battles, and it makes life so much easier knowing that you're all on the same side and rooting for each other. Get vulnerable, be honest, and encourage one another in your journeys. You're going to have to ignore both your comfort zone and the "judge a book by its cover" thing you've got going on in order to meet and make some quality friends, but they are worth it.

I wish you knew that while your body changes size, your character remains constant. Yes, take care of your body: go to Zumba classes and limit your ice cream intake. But also take care of your soul: spend time with friends who build you up, read books that teach you about others and about yourself, and don't take yourself too seriously. Be fun while you get things done, and remember that relationships with people are far more important than completing a to-do list.

I wish you knew that while Kentucky may not be the most obvious or even logical choice, it really is the perfect place for you, and you're going to make lifelong friends at school and at church. While it hurts to leave home for 2 infinitely long years, it hurts even more leaving Kentucky. And that's good, because it means you fully gave your heart to your new family, that you invested and sowed and built relationships, and you will see them again. Trust me. Many times, though it's never enough times.

I wish you knew that if a guy doesn't pursue you properly, he isn't worth it. And if he does pursue you the right way, it still may not work out, and that's not a poor reflection on either of you. Remember Pastor Trout's words: the right person in the right way at the right time. I'm still believing that God's story is going to be more amazing than whatever I can imagine.

Blog Every Day Feb: Day Three - Scared

Linking up with Bailey Jean for Blog Every Day in February!

Here are the prompts for both your benefit and mine. And because this fabulous shade of pink needs to be admired more.

Something that scares me... besides spiders hiding somewhere in my house???

When I was younger, I was petrified for skeletons. My family went put-put golfing at a pirate-themed course, and because there was a skeleton on the back wall, I didn't want to golf. At night, I was always imagining skeletons at the foot of my bed. Once, I got so scared of these skeletons that I slept in a crouching position on top of my pillow, which put me literally the farthest distance from the skeletons as possible. I told you I was petrified!

Nowadays, my fear of skeletons has calmed down to just a general dislike. I'm more afraid of accidentally burning my house down via cooking or leaving on the hair straightener. Also, I'm not terribly fond of crosswalks, and I'm pretty sure I'm justified in this concern.

Like Bailey, I struggle with being afraid of what others think of me. Some days aren't bad, but other days my every conversation is under the scrutiny of my insecurities and I want to hide in a cave and not let anyone know me.

I'm also afraid of missing God's will for my life. Some of this is a good, holy, fear-of-the-Lord kind of fear, and I'm glad to have that. But some of this is a selfish, me-based fear that doesn't believe God is good enough or that I'm good enough for Him or that He can use me whenever He wants.

How do I overcome these fears? The Word of God, the Blood papers, dialogue with my parents and close friends, and journaling and praying all help me get focused on the Truth. The truth is that I have nothing to fear, that God loves me so I don't have to worry what others think of me, that He is using me now in my flawed state, and that nothing I do can screw up God's plans.

Thank you, Bailey, for such a great prompt! If you would like to join the link-up, hop on over to Anchored in Love and share your story, what fires you up, and what scares you.

Blogging-versary

Today this little blog celebrates its fifth year of existence! Does that mean it's a birthday, not an anniversary? Possibly. So maybe to stick with the anniversary theme, I should say that this blog and I have been together for 5 years? Sure, that sounds like I have no life great!

For a much better blogging-versary/birthday read, hop over to Samara's post about her 5 years. Yay for my bestie! And yes, we are those friends who started blogs within one day of each other and who will probably have kids at the same time... oh, sorry, TMI? You should be used to it after 5 years ;)

To celebrate this anniversary/birthday/awkward title, I want to share some ways this blog has helped me grow. Hopefully this won't be too snooze-worthy, and if it is, too bad - I already told you to go check out Samara's post.

I've grown in my writing; that's obvious, because this is a blog. Specifically, though, posting over the years has helped me grow more confident in my own voice. When I go back to old posts, I can tell when I was writing for myself or when I was writing for my audience's imagined expectations, and I like the former better. I'm sorry if a Disney song bursts forth right now, but I have to say it: when I was "bee-ing myself" like the Genie recommends {would you like some wine with that cheese?}, my posts were and are a more pleasant read. Because isn't the point of blogging to share yourself with others? And the point of reading other blogs to learn about other people?

Also, creative challenges like Victoria's 31 Days of Writing have been full of opportunities for growth! And now I'm signing myself up for a similar challenge in February...must be a challenge junkie.

I've grown in my ability to process life. I don't know if I would have been able to describe the strange combination of emotions surrounding my grandpa's memorial, or fully process everything from Nicaragua, or handle all the feels that came with choosing a college, without this blog to help me sort things out. On the flip side of this, I think I've grown in my ability to discern my level of personal privacy. What kinds of things am I comfortable sharing on this blog and what things do I want to keep to my journal and close friends?

I've grown in the blogging community. Five years ago, I didn't know what a blogging community was. I didn't even know how to find other blogs. {Sometimes I laugh at my former self, but then I realize that laughing at silly people isn't nice, so I make myself stop out of pity....and you can laugh at the current me. Don't feel guilty.} Now I reward myself with reading other blogs and following the rabbit trail, if you will, from one blog to another and discovering even more treasures on the internet. Also, I know that more people than just my stalker sister {hey, Paige!} read my blog, and that's kind of cool {but not as cool as Paige is}.

I've grown numerically. Here are my posting numbers from the last five years: in 2009, I posted 31 times. In 2010, 48 posts made their way onto the web. 2011 saw the "publish" button clicked 51 times. 2012 hit a multiple of eleven with 88 posts. And 2013 broke the triple digit ceiling for a smashing {see what I did there?} total of 135 posts. Between the Not Alone Series, Finish This, and 7 Quick Takes link ups, plus the afore-mentioned February challenge, 2014 should continue this upward trajectory. Woot!

Life is crazy, and is it weird that I'm glad to have some documentation?? In 2009, there is no way on God's green earth that I could have imagined life in 2014. Five years ago, I was living at my parents' house praying about where to finish college and wondering if I could leave my bff. Now I'm living in my own home with my bff, and college is something I tease my sisters about. How things do change.

Thanks for being a part of the journey!

Finish This Week 2

Linking up with Jen, Lisa, Nicole, and Becky!

Check out the links here :)

If I could make anything grow on trees, it would be instant manicures. Pick one off the tree and BAM! Your nails are done. No waiting, no chipping, no clumping. Done nails, just like that.

I can't stop smiling because I've seen Sherlock Season 3. Because it's almost my birthday. Because zumba is tomorrow night. Because there is a Tardis blanket on my bed.  Because I'm in the middle of two good books. Because January has been awesome {and hard and wonderful and challenging and stretching} and February is shaping up to be pretty darn awesome. Because today is a good hair day. Because tomorrow is Volunteer Day. Because God has great plans for me.

I get back to nature by admiring Mt. Rainier. Ahh! 

via

I dread washing the fridge. I can clean the bathroom and the rest of the house until the cows come home, but please dear Lord above don't make me clean the fridge. Please distribute grown-up points here, though, because I have actually cleaned the fridge since moving out on my own. Once. Moving on. 

There ya have it! See you next week for Version 3 of Finish This. 

Healing

Are you okay if I keep sharing prayer themes? They are personal and vulnerable, but they also hold me accountable and help me process what God is highlighting. Hope you don't mind :)

The Lord gave me today's focus last night: healing. I know so many people, including myself, in need of physical, spiritual, emotional, mental, and relational healing, and today they are all on my heart.

via

So today I'm crying out to the Lord for my friends and family. I'm praying for the presence of Jesus to flood and surround these specific people:

• C and her family
• R and her family
• A and her family
• the CCU community

Will you pray with me?

Happiest Season of All

I read this post recently and the whole thing really spoke to me {I was going to name a specific paragraph, but then I reread the post and decided it was all really wonderful}. I love that Advent is not waiting meaning sitting on your hands, but it's really about preparing and making ready and fully embracing the season in which God has placed you.

This season, and maybe even the whole of 2014, I think God is focusing on how He pursues me. I was reminded of a story in this book and how much God has both given to and given up for me. Yes, gifts are a bit cliche this time of year, but this Sunday my pastor shared some really lovely and practical gifts that God has given to His bride, like the fruit of the Spirit. God has given us gentleness, patience, self-control, etc. I love considering how richly God has blessed and equipped believers for our daily lives.

God has also blessed my family with togetherness! Christmas is my favorite time of the year because ALL the sisters are home! So far we have never been apart over Christmas, and I hope that this tradition can continue forever :)

Praying God's abundant blessings over you and your family this Christmas!

Fantastic Friday

As I've mentioned before, Thursday is my day to volunteer at my local crisis pregnancy center. Because of HIPAA and other privacy laws, I can't share too many details, but I think I can tell you this: a few weeks ago I saw my first client by myself.

I was nervous about it, because previously I had only shadowed my director with clients. But the appointment went well, and afterwards I added this client on my mental prayer list. Every time I thought about this lady, I prayed for her. She came to a follow-up appointment {on a different day at the clinic, so I didn't see her} and then that seemed to be it. I called her every couple of weeks and left a message just to check in.

Last night I left what I thought would be my last message; we can't leave too many or we cross the line from checking in to bothering, and we don't want to cross that line. So I called her and left a message and said another prayer and went back to my other duties.

Just a few minutes later, the phone rang. My director answered it and then, "Bek, it's for you!" My immediate thought was, "It's either {this client} or my mom, and I don't think my mom even has this number!"

It was my client! She was calling back to let me know how things are progressing and everything is going really well. We talked for a few minutes and then she had to go, but I was ecstatic that she had called! To know that God answered my prayers, my specific prayers for this girl, and that He had used me just a little bit to help this gal in a time of need....wow. My mind was completely boggled.

I told Samara last night that as cliche as it sounds, I feel like my life has meaning because God used me to help this client. Not that I'm so insecure about the point of my life, but that I'm getting to the point - my goal is to be used by the Lord in whatever way He deems the most awesome, and now I can point to this specific instance as a time He used me.

From my selfish, one-sided perspective, this is something I can hang on to as a tangible "Look at what God does with useless pathetic me; if He can do that with me to work with, He can do anything!" This testimony, even though it's mine, increases my faith each time I think of it.

The Lord didn't have to use me, and He didn't have to let me know any more of her story, but He did! I'm so grateful and thrilled and in awe of how He works.

I hope that this encourages you, and if you would like to get involved in a crisis pregnancy center, allow me to encourage you to jump on board! There are tons of ways to bless these clinics, so don't think you're limited strictly to volunteering your time. If you need ideas, hit me up :)

Happy Friday!

Thursday = Volunteer Day

Some of you know this already, but in case you don't, here's the scoop.

On Thursdays, I volunteer at a crisis pregnancy clinic. So far I'm still in training, but it's still one of my favorite parts of the week. The atmosphere in the clinic is so peaceful and welcoming; each time I arrive I think of the hours and hours of prayer and preparation that went into opening this new-to-the-area clinic. The grounds have been soaked in prayers of preparation, and it is evident even in the parking lot.

Last week, I got to shadow the director with a client for the very first time. It was a surreal experience for me, partly because I've been volunteering since April and hadn't seen a client yet, and partly because seeing a client is what I've been praying and preparing and training for since last September {I did my Care Net training before my internship in the Frozen Tundra}.

And it was also surreal because this was the first time I encountered someone facing a crisis pregnancy. We hear about these women all the time {or at least, I do because that's what I'm interested in}, but last week put a face to my prayers. This girl was not an example in my training manual; she was not even someone my director or fellow volunteers had met. This was a girl sitting on the couch a foot away from me, considering her options.

Because of privacy laws, I can't tell you more than that. But I can ask you for your prayers, for this girl and her situation as well as for me. I cannot fully describe to you how it is both intimidating and peaceful in the counseling room. There is pressure to say the right things, respond the right way, make your face look calm but involved, concerned but not freaked out, neutral but caring. But there is such peace, because Jesus is in the room too, and He is so, so faithful to prompt the right words and responses, and His heart shines out through our faces.

Psalm 27:13 ~ 

"I believe that 

I shall look upon

 the goodness of the Lord

 in the land of the living!" 

{ESV} 

Thoughtful Tidbits

In no particular order, here are some thoughts...

Grandma told me last night that she is very glad to live with us and that she's grateful she's not alone. She said that even when we're in different rooms doing different things, it's ok because she's not alone in the house. This really made me think, because Grandma and I are very much alike: we are both firstborns {that encompasses A LOT}, we are both very organized, and we both like to be around people. But it's been a big change having her with us... to be fair, I got home only a day and a half before she moved in, and that was less than a month ago, so everyone is still adjusting.

Like the new look? I finally sat down and learned how to make tabs up there- woot! Feel free to check it out and give suggestions, either for the Intro page or for future pages. What do you want to see?

Mom and Pops are in Texas for a couple days, enjoying the 90* weather...I'm not jealous...well, not very jealous. 75* is my ideal temp, but I'll take 90 over 40 :(

Speaking of Texas, I'm heading there myself in a couple of weeks. My internship in the Frozen Tundra ended, but I agreed to go to Dallas and help out with their big event there. Yay for business travel! It will be fun to see my co-workers again, and the sunshine sure helps :)

My weekend plans consist of the Ladies' Conference at church and maybe painting my nails. How about you?

Funny Friday, and Life Is Going Onward

I'll be home in 11 days, and boy am I going to miss living with my grandparents! Or Ding and Dong, as I affectionately refer to them :) They laugh harder than I do when I call them this, so don't think I'm being disrespectful. Anyway, these two keep me amused {and they keep themselves amused pretty well too!} and I hope that my stalker sister is up to the challenge of making me laugh each day :)

Scene: last night, Grams and Grandpa are sitting in the living room watching a movie. I couldn't tell if it was a Hallmark movie {Grammie's} or a cowboy movie {Grandpa's} but they were both watching it so I figured it was a cowboy drama or something.
On-screen, an older man is riding a motorcycle.

Grandpa: He's an old man and he's riding a motorcycle. Why can't I ride a motorcycle?

Grammie: Because you're too short. You wouldn't be able to steer it.

Grandpa: Well, I'll get a little one then.

Yes, friends, this conversation actually happened. And today is their 60th wedding anniversary. What a legacy of love and laughter.

Well, life does go on, doesn't it? Part of me has gone on like nothing's different: I've gone to work, laughed, gone to see The Lion King on-stage {marvelous! Post coming on that soon!}, and gone shopping. But another part of me is still in shock. Actually, I think I've entered the denial stage, because even though I know Grandpa is in Heaven, I keep thinking that I'll return home in a couple weeks and both Grandma and Grandpa will be in their apartment when I go visit them. But that is not at all the case.

L and I are doing a Bible study by Margaret Feinberg, and she has a little mantra for when life is overwhelming. "Breathe in. Breathe out. God is good. God is still on the throne." And that's what I've been repeating to myself. God is good, all the time, and all the time, He is good.

Gee, God, You’re hysterical

God is so funny sometimes. He’s funny sometimes in the omg God You have a great sense of humor- what a great joke on life sense, and then He’s funny in the, gee, thanks, God. I know You called me to this; why don’t you just confirm in in like two different places by two strangers who don’t know each other ONLINE of all places! Yeah. He’s really funny. I love Him.

On Sunday, the Lord and I had one of those conversations. You know, the ones where you’ll look back and say that was the point when things changed. Today, I open up some blogs that I follow, and I read a post by Jami found here and another post by Heather found here. So yeah. Go check them out. Both these ladies are awesome, and God used them today to speak to my heart. Thank you, ladies!

Depending on your perspective…

There are only 5 weeks left of classes! Praise Jesus! This means that it’s really crunch time, and I’m working all the time on project after project. Sorry, blog world, that means that you get a bit neglected. So sad. But I promise that Christmas break will more than make up for it!

I met with my academic adviser for the last time today. Sad! I will be registering for my last college courses next Monday. Holy nut-lugs, Batman! I graduate in like 6 months. Augh!

My adviser is great, though, and she kindly offered to write me a letter of recommendation for either grad school or a job. I thought that was very sweet of her. And she told me she thought I was gutsy, because I moved across the country to attend a school I was unfamiliar with, and here I am graduating in 2 years! God is so good. :)

Anyway, that’s the brief update on life. Pray for me, please, dear readers, that I do the crunching during crunch time and that I don’t get crunched!