While most of us feel called to marriage, it is important to see the beauty in all vocations! If/when you were discerning religious life, which communities interest{ed} you? What do you see as the positives of that vocation?
Tempted to pull out the Protestant card for 200, but I'm going to hunker down and respond to this prompt as best as I can because we've all had The Question strike: what if I stay single to infinity and beyond???
When I was a kid, this question didn't really bother me; in fact, I don't think I ever asked myself this question. In my mind, I knew I was going to grow up, get married, have a daughter named Jessie and a collie named Lassie, and teach ballet lessons. Done and done.
Except not.
When I was in high school, The Question started whispering to me, especially in youth group. So many times I got the impression that God wouldn't let me get married until I was completely happy staying single for the rest of my life. And that scared the living daylights out of me, because I wanted to get married and didn't want to stay single, and if God knows my innermost thoughts, He'd know if I was faking happiness. So obviously I was doomed to be single.
Some of these ideas stayed with me through college, but part of me realized that relationships, not just marriage, take a lot of work and that college wasn't the right time for me to jump on that train. So I learned to be really content by myself, and to rejoice with my friends, even when the diamonds on their hands sparkled more than the diamonds on mine {because diamonds from your parents are guaranteed to have less sparkle than one from a TDH, especially when all your friends are paying attention}. But with my awesome roomie and wonderful friends, I was able to shush The Question for the time.
And now I've been out of school for 2 years and life is whirring at 75 mph and God is taking me all different directions and when I catch my breath and The Question catches me, I usually have an answer. If I stay single to infinity and beyond, it will be okay. I will probably just keep doing what I'm doing, working, volunteering, being with friends and family and church family, watching "The Office" and reading lots of books, cooking new foods, making blogging friends {like you, readers!}, and loving Jesus. My life won't end if my marriage never starts, and I think that's the answer to the untwisted version of The Question that has been chasing me all these years.
The Question may sneak around some more, but instead of listening to it, I'm going to keep living life with Jesus. To infinity and beyond.
Hey, I got mentioned! Great post and it's hard to live with the open question of marriage, but by God's grace, we do. As long as we follow and love God, our life will be full.
ReplyDeleteYou're an inspiration. :) So well said, Bek.
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