Friday, June 21, 2013

Funny Friday - Family Edition

As promised, here are two funny stories for your viewing pleasure. One is a bit of a throwback, and the other was a phone call earlier this week. Enjoy!

My Sister, the Pyromaniac

My family has this long-running joke about Sister J being a pyromaniac, or "pyro" for those of you who abbrieve :) The origin of this endearing nickname is a story from long, long ago. I don't think any of my sisters were in double-digits, but we were certainly old enough to help set the table for dinner.

My mom always has a pretty centerpiece on the table - usually flowers or a plant - and on this occasion, the flowers were flanked by two tall candles. For some reason, my pyro sister wanted to light the candles for a romantic dinner...with the entire family. I'm actually not sure why she wanted the candles lit, but Mom humored her and told her how to strike the match and light the candles without burning herself.

**Note: Sister J is now a mature young lady with a healthy respect and admiration for candles, matches, and flames in general. She also has a clean record. End note.

J probably used three or four matches to actually create a flame, so she was a bit flustered. Mom offered to help, but J was determined to accomplish this feat on her own. After lighting a match, however, the candles were stubbornly not lighting. I think the wick had wax on it or something; anyway, it took another couple matches to light the darn things. Finally, success! The candles were lit, and the ambiance was set.

Mission accomplished, J blew out the match. Without turning her head. So the candle she had just struggled to light was now blown out also.

Sister J learned a valuable lesson that night. What that lesson is, I don't know. I personally leave the pyro to the pyromaniac of the fam.

Grandpa & Greek Yogurt

Earlier this week I called my grandparents {you know, the ones who live in the Frozen Tundra} and was talking to Grandpa. To refresh your memory, this is the grandpa who told me "Grammie won't go fishing with me anymore...I made her be the anchor one time, and now she won't go with me!" That Grandpa.

Me: Grandpa, tell Grammie that I'm still enjoying Noosa yogurt!
Grandpa: She just had to throw one out the other day.
Me: Uh oh. What for?
Grandpa: It expired before she got to it.
Me: Well, why didn't you help her eat it?
Grandpa: I don't care for that stuff.
Me: I guess if this is the first one that she's had to throw out, that's not too bad.
Grandpa: Yeah, she's been eating it since you lived with us, but I don't think she looks any more Greek.

And that, friends, is Funny Friday. Enjoy your weekend!