Wednesday, July 11, 2012

What a Week

Thank God for those brief respites where you can sit back and think, a heck of a lot just happened in {however many days} and I’m just gonna sit her for a second…

As you know, I went on a road trip with my bestie last weekend. Then on Tuesday, another friend and I left for Orlando. It was a red-eye flight, but something made it better- at our layover, we got to see a friend! He’s in the Army and was on his way home! It was sooooo good to see him; I had been bummed that we were missing him by a day. But God is good, and we got to hang out for almost an hour while we waited for our connections. Thank You Jesus for surprise encounters!

So I just got back from Florida Monday night (as in, Tuesday morning) and yesterday went to work. For an hour. Then I came home and took a nap. :)

Some of you may know that I was working on my application for a job in Wash. D.C. Well, I found out yesterday that the position has been filled. Yup. No job there. So my dad and I were talking about it, and I started crying and I was like, Dad, I just don’t know what I’m doing anymore!  And Dad, being the wise, amazing dad that he is, said, you miss the structure of school. That’s all. You’ll get into the structure of home pretty soon. That was reassuring, a bit. But at the same time, I’m still disappointed that the position filled before I even had a chance. And then I’m mad at myself, because my original goal was to apply by the end of June, and I wonder if I had actually done that if I would have had a chance. But oh well. Those are “what-ifs” and I try not to play that game any more.

Yesterday, in my depression and upset-ed-ness, I kept thinking, I want to move back to my Other Home!!! and while part of that is true, I know that it’s really just me wanting to run away from tough situations here, and that moving is not for right now. But friends in my Other Home, know that I miss you all like craaaaazy and am praying about the right time to come back. Because oh yeah, that internship nearby? Not a guarantee. And I’m the type of person who likes to write things on my Life Calendar in permanent marker, not pencil, so hearing that was like, really? is nothing for sure??? And that makes me nervous and frustrated, and sad, because I don’t know when I’m going to see my Other Families again, and I’d love to curl up into a ball right now and sob my eyes out. But I have to go to work today, so I shouldn't. But you understand, I’m sure. Everyone’s been here, or is going to be here in this position, so I know I’m not alone.

Thank You Jesus for my parents and their wisdom.

Well, I don’t really have a strong conclusion to this post. Pray for me if you think of it, please. I appreciate it.
Hopefully I’ll have news by the next post. 


  1. I completely understand this scenario of emotions. And my dad said pretty much the same thing when I cried about wanting to move back to OKC lol. But even though it took months, and could have taken longer, God showed me my purpose here. It is still being unveiled and some days its a wonder I've even had a glimpse. So I know your glimpse is coming soon. I'll pray for your eyes to see the job that God has designed for you!

    1. Thank you, Laura! I'm glad I'm not the only person going through this awkward transition time. :) Praying for you, and grateful for your prayers! :)