Not Alone Series: Discernment

It's Tuesday again! The link-up party is hosted by the ever-fabulous Jen at Jumping in Puddles and Morgan at Follow and Believe.

We all agree that discernment is challenging. Figuring out what the Lord is calling you to do with your life can be frustrating and exhausting. But, then add on lack of family support, cultural pressures, and your personal expectations... ugh. And, this isn't just in relation to vocational discernment, but general life discernment, too! How do you keep going? What helps you to push through? How can we encourage one another? What indicators have you experienced that lets you know you're going down the right path?

I think the best way to answer this is to review some Scriptures that talk about God and our plans:

The plans of the heart belong to man, 

but the answer of the tongue is from the Lord.

Proverbs 16:1

For I know the plans I have for you, 

declares the Lord, 

plans for welfare and not for evil, 

to give you a future and a hope.

Jeremiah 29:11

God knows the plan for my life, because, uh, He came up with the plan. So God is directing my steps because He can see the end from the beginning {Revelation 22:13} and I can barely remember what I wore last week. 

So God knows where my life is headed, but how do I know? How do I go about living this life when I don't know where I'm going to end up? 

This question used to bug me... and by "bug me" I really mean keep me up all night worrying about Big Life Decisions. 

I would lie awake for hours thinking about all the things that I could see myself doing and wondering how to cram it all in to one life and wondering what degree I should get so that I could pursue as many career paths as possible and then I thought about meeting a man and naming our kids {at one point, I had a boy name and a girl name starting with every letter of the alphabet... just in case.} and worrying about how I would teach ballet and homeschool my children and travel the world and start an orphanage and live on a horse ranch and and and. On and on it went, and I would get more and more worked up each time I thought about Big Life Decisions.  

Then I got some sleep and realized that God is in control and that there is a very good reason for Him to be able to see beginning to end and for me to not be able to see past next week. I learned that I can trust Him, really truly trust Jesus with my life, and, like Mr. Incredible yells says, "We'll get there when we get there!"

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That was a really roundabout way of getting to this part: when I'm faced with A Big Life Decision, it's ok. I already know that the outcome is going to be good because God is in control. I don't really want to start a free will vs predestination discussion, so I will simply say that I believe God is good, no matter what, and He works all things together for the good of those who love Him {Romans 8:28}.

Shall we get nitty-gritty for just a paragraph? When faced with A Big Life Decision, I pray. I consider my options. I ask my parents, my discipler, my friends {when appropriate}, for their opinions. I wait - no haste on Big Life Decisions! One of the things I specifically pray for is that my parents and discipler and I will all be in agreement, because that is really powerful. 

When I was considering going to Kentucky for the rest of my degree, I prayed that my parents and I would all hear the same answer, and we did and off I went. 

A few months ago, I was praying about a move, and my parents and I did not hear the same thing. I waited a bit longer, and suddenly things changed that made staying the right answer. 

Personally, the most important part of making A Big Life Decision is the peace that comes with an answer. Even when the answer doesn't make sense for there to be peace, like moving across the country to go to a random little school filled with Southern strangers, I was completely at peace in the way only Christ can provide. Sure, I was nervous as hell, but deeper, there was peace that surpassed understanding {Philippians 4:7}.

Whew, this is way longer than I anticipated. Like, way longer. If you are still reading, way to go! How do you discern God's will for your life? Join the conversation!

Doula Adventures: It's Official!

I babysat for 10.5 hours last weekend. No, I'm not cra-... ok, I'm slightly crazy. But you know what made those 10.5 hours totally worth it? Those hours earned me the last chunk of registration money for Birth Arts International, and today I clicked "make payment and begin the next step in your doula adventures...and your life." Ok, the button didn't really say that; I'm projecting a bit. But that's the jist of what it said, or what I felt, because now it is official: I've started the process of doula certification!!!

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Step One: read the manual. 

Step Two: create a plan and schedule for the various assignments. 

Step Three: blog about it :D I know you're dying to follow along, so please note you made it into the top three items on this {massive} to-do list. That's right, feel the love. 

I can't thank you all enough for your kind comments, encouragement, questions, and enthusiasm. I've doubted myself many times {and I'm sure I will doubt myself again}, and you all keep holding me up and helping me push on past the worries and insecurities. You all are the best!

This post is short because I have a lot of reading to do, but hey, it's official reading now :)

Finish This: Week Thirty-one

Linking up with Nicole at Three 31, Jen at The Arizona Russums, Becky at The Java Mama, and Lisa at Coastlined. Join the fun on their link-up!

If I went back to school, I would study entrepreneurship or more consumer behavior. I think the psychology behind decisions is really fascinating, even though I only took one Psych class during my college career. The Consumer Behavior class I took was awesome, and I'd love to get into that more. 

My favorite subject in school literature. Junior and senior years were classical and British literature, respectively, and I had so much fun in those classes. AP English was also one of my favorite classes, because we read Shakespeare aloud and interviewed experts about their definitions of literature. 

I also enjoyed algebra, history, and Rhetoric II {Rhetoric I was painful, but the second year was much more fun and applicable}. 

I wish I had paid more attention to the activities I really enjoyed, instead of focusing on the things I'd limited myself to because I was afraid. 

The dumbest thing I did in high school was convince my history group that we could do our presentation on Alexander the Great using puppets. While our presentation was amusing, it was also immature and ill-prepared. Oops.

In high school, I thought I knew the direction life would take me. Ha! When I graduated from high school, I wanted to be a physical therapist and use ballet for therapy. When I started college, I took one look at how many science classes PT would take, and I cried. Then I changed my major to business, transferred to a school in Kentucky, and am looking at a completely different career than I had planned. I couldn't have imagined all this in high school, and it would have scared the crap out of me if I could. Thank God He only gives us what we can handle!

Thanks for joining! If you want to Finish This, answer the prompts in the comments or add your link to the party. See you next week :) 

Decisions, Decisions

Life is full of decisions. As Jen from Conversion Diary points out {check out Lesson 5}, sometimes we need a break from making decisions. Unfortunately, I'm not in a season where break-taking is an option. The past several days felt like this:

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Which doula certification program do I choose? Which doula book should I read next? When should I start the next course? Should I start babysitting more so I can more quickly afford the doula workshop?

Where should I work while I'm getting certified? Do I stay in my current industry or switch? Who is going to be my new flatmate, since Samara is off on a new adventure? Do I stay in this area or move? 

When am I going to do laundry? How often does the floor need vacuumed? Is it time to run the dishwasher yet? How many times in a row can I have cereal for dinner!?

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Things have gotten a little crazy in my head, as evidenced by the slew of questions that are taking way more brain power than necessary. Last night, the only decision I wanted to make was "Can I finish another episode of 'The Office' before I have to leave?" 

I'm feeling better today. The decisions are still looming, but the stress level has decreased. I don't know if it was crying {check} or talking with Samara {check} and AJ {check} or simply a good night's sleep {um, not check}, but things are looking better today. God is in control. He already knows my life's story, so I'm going to keep clinging to Him and asking Him for direction.