Not Alone Series: Online Dating

Linking up with Jen at Jumping in Puddles and Morgan at Follow and Believe - join the fun!

Not all of us have jumped into the world of online dating, but many of us have! What are those things that we should AND that we shouldn't do?! If someone you know is considering online dating, how would you encourage him/her? What advice do you have?

Well, I fall into that very first category of "haven't jumped" and so I inquired as to a prompt for those in my boat. Morgan suggested I share why I haven't jumped in, my perceptions, if I know anyone else who's tried it, etc. So here goes.

I have not tried online dating, and I am not saying that I never will. I know several people who married someone they met online, and I know other people who haven't had good experiences. We all know people who love it and people who hate it, don't we?

Right now, online dating not something I want to do, but I've taken the goal of online dating {meeting new people} and looked for other ways to accomplish that goal. How do I meet new people? I have to try new things!

With that in mind, I've attempted to be more open about new adventures. When my new flatmate said she was going ballroom dancing with some people from her work, I joined her {and had a blast!}. When my friend says she wants to go to a different church's hang-out, I put it on my calendar and join her {it's still on the calendar}. When I'm at Notions and there are new people, I hand them some apple crisp and introduce myself {surest way to make new friends: feed them!}.

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I say that the goal of online dating is to make new friends, which maybe is a little strange. Personally, having new friends as my goal keeps things simple and helps me not focus so much on a relationship status. My focus is not on "finding a husband" but rather on building relationships with the people God connects me to, and right now that means being willing to try new things and meet new people. 

What's your online dating experience? Would you recommend it, based on your own experience or a friend's?

Doula Adventures: Bradley Class is Done!

{Oops, I totally did not do a two/thirds done post. Forgive me and blame the summer's sunshine!}

Bradley Birth Class is over. It was a fantastic twelve weeks, and when the last class was over, we were all hugging and planning a reunion after the babies are born. Yipee!

The biggest lesson I learned from the Bradley class is how long it takes to practice and get comfortable with the different techniques. Honestly, I think you could go through any birth class and find a method or six that will work for you, but the real key to success is to practice. Stephanie said it many times: labor is a marathon, and it takes time to train for a marathon.

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The Bradley method touches on every aspect of pregnancy, birth, and postpartum. The two couples had lots of questions, and Stephanie was prepared for everything. No question was outside her scope of knowledge, or if it was, she found an answer the next week.

I really appreciated how there was no "normal" standard for a labor and delivery; all the information presented was "some women experience this and some women experience that." I think the couples found that helpful so they could know all the possibilities but also know that nothing was wrong if they did or didn't experience something.

The Bradley method is awesome at including dads. Dr. Bradley's book is actually written to dads, which I think dads appreciate with so many other pregnancy books geared towards women, obviously. The book was a little annoying to read, and Dr. Bradley has some funky, perhaps out-dated ideas, but overall good information.

If you want to learn more about the Bradley method, you can ask me anything or check out their website. Also, thanks to multiple babysitting jobs this week, BAI certification should start by the end of October at the latest {I'm hoping}. Thanks for all your kind and enthusiastic comments - you help me stay excited when the process seems slow. You are all wonderful!

Finish This: Week Thirty-six

Linking up with our fabulous hostesses: Nicole from Three 31, Jen from The Arizona Russums, Becky from The Java Mama, and Lisa from Coastlined.

I am serious about reading. Zumba, cleaning, drinking water, trimming my nails, having fun, spending time with my friends and family, blogging, phone dates, a clean room, and British television.

I am most relaxed when the house is clean, my friends are near, and wine and chocolate are involved.

There is no place like your own bed. I don't care how thick your air mattress is or how comfy your friend's couch is, my own bed is my favorite place to sleep. Please and thank you.

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Not Alone Series: Chivalry

Linking up with the marvelous Jen from Jumping In Puddles and Morgan from Follow and Believe!

Chivalry should not become a lost art and we, as women, ought to step up to the plate a bit more and encourage men to treat us as women, thereby respecting them as men. Do you have tips, ideas, or stories to encourage men to be... men?! Open doors for us, initiate dates, honor us as women, etc? Let's chat!

Hmm. This is a great conversation to start, and I'm grateful for the opportunity to dialogue about it a bit. That being said, I imagine that this is going to be an ongoing conversation with lots of growth and adjustments, and we will probably come to a variety of conclusions multiple times.

Right now, I am concentrating on being respectful of people, men and women. This means not participating in sexist jokes, comments, or mindsets. I'm not going to say someone can or should do something simply because of their gender; my goal is to be respectful of people because we are all made in the image of God. Below are some ways we can show respect to both men and women:

Listen without dismissing - I'm sure we've all experienced it: we're talking about something we care about, and someone else listens for 2 seconds and then rolls his or her eyes and leaves the conversation.  You're passionate about the Seahawks and I barely remember which sport they play, but that doesn't give me an excuse to dismiss the topic as stupid or uninteresting. It's interesting to you, so I should be considerate and respectful and ask you questions {and you should be considerate of me and not mock my lack of knowledge}.

Encourage those around you - If someone is kind, considerate, awesome, generous, or something else that gives you warm fuzzy feelings, tell them! Encouragement and gratitude are a huge part of showing respect, because you're recognizing and acknowledging people's gifts and strengths, and maybe even their weaknesses that are growing into strengths.

Laugh with, not at - Although sarcasm may be in vogue, and although it can be rather humorous, continually putting someone down just for laughs is not cool. Make yourself the butt of a joke, or change the tone so that everyone laughs at wit, not individuals. Even gentle teasing gets old after a while, so make sure that your jokes and barbs are uplifting.

What do you think? How can we be more respectful of the people around us?

Currently...

...listening to Imogen Heap's album Ellipse and loving basically every track.

...reading This Star Won't Go Out by Esther Grace Earl and her parents. Esther battled cancer for several years, was active in the Nerdfighter community, and wrote pages and pages in her journals. After she passed away in 2010, her parents published her journals, along with other stories and notes from friends and family. While The Fault In Our Stars is not written about Esther, John Green dedicated it to her and was inspired - in more ways than just his book - by Esther. 

TSWGO organization

...watching "Doctor Who" Season 8, Episode 3 tonight with Samara! I'm excited to see the interaction between Clara and Robin Hood :) And before tonight's episode, I will probably watch at least one episode of "Wonderfalls," a quirky one-season show with Lee Pace. Yes, I'm obsessed, but how can I not be?

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...working on a DIY project for a table lamp. I'm excited to share the finished product soon :)

...drinking lots of water. Feeling slightly dehydrated and I want to nip that in the bud. 

...wondering if I should have taken my sister up on her invitation to go to Wild Waves for one of the last nice days of the summer. She called this morning and I opted out - does that make me old?? Probably, but at least I own it, right?

...anticipating some packages in the mail. I ordered some clothing from Amazon and some sheets from Macys yesterday {thanks be unto whoever invented online shopping}, and both orders should be in here in a week-ish. {I think the fact that I'm excited for new sheets is confirmation that I'm old.}

...looking forward to a friend's birthday celebration tomorrow. Brunch, relaxation, and picnics in the park are all on the docket, and I'm thinking about making some sangria :)

...thinking that I should exercise and shower in order to fully appreciate this wonderful weekend.

Linking up with Bailey Jean today for Day Six of her Blog-tember challenge. Thanks for the prompt, Bailey!

Finish This: Week Thirty-five

By now, I'm sure you know the link-up drill. Thank you to our awesome hostesses, Jen at The Arizona Russums, Nicole at Three 31, Lisa at Coastlined, and Becky at The Java Mama.

I celebrated Labor Day by moving Samara out of the condo, moving my new flatmate into the condo, celebrating my sister's birthday with the family, playing hooky out of church to have brunch with Samara, watching "Only Lovers Left Alive" with Cami and Samara, venturing to IKEA with the new flatmate, making dinner with a friend, and attending my second-to-last Bradley class. Phew! Are you exhausted reading it? Because I was definitely exhausted doing it!

My dream job/career would be working as a doula, running a crisis pregnancy center, homeschooling my kids, and maybe writing a travel blog. That last one is just an excuse so I can travel, but who says it won't work? 

I am very fortunate to be able to pursue these dreams; it's such a blessing to have opportunities to do what I love doing, or even start down the path of what I think I want to do. As all the sh*t happens around the world with wars, kidnappings, persecution, etc., I am beyond grateful to be able to spend life in such a beautiful fashion. 

My first paying job was working in retail my senior year of high school. Babysitting had been bringing in some moolah since I was 12, but my first "real" job was at LifeWay Christian Stores. I stayed busy stocking shelves and chatting with customers. It was mostly fun, and I enjoyed being known as "the queen of fiction" and working with "the Bible expert" and "the Spanish translator."

My current job is coordinating all things meeting-related for my company's peer group clients. It sounds super complicated fancy boring, but basically I make sure everyone has everything they need for their meetings. It involves a lot of phone calls and checklists and email templates, and it's pretty fun. 

Also, even though I'm not currently working as a doula, I definitely consider doula certification a job in terms of responsibility. Currently my "assignment" is to save as much money as I can to pay for the certification program, and since I have 3 babysitting jobs between now and next Friday, I think I can say that I'm on top of my homework!

There you have it! Tune in next week for another round of Finish This, and visit the link-up for more posts this week. 

Not Alone Series: Back In the Saddle Again

{Not that I didn't love Labor Day's three-day-weekend, but did missing Monday throw off anyone else's game? Whew! Sorry to be late, ladies!}

We are back! As we get back into the swing of things with NAS, what other ways can we be more involved at church or in our communities? Is there a parish ministry you have been wanting to help with or start up? What about that after school program for homeless kids? Has something been preventing you from getting involved? How do you think this will help you personally, spiritually, and emotionally?

First off, I am so excited that NAS is back! Ladies, I've missed you each week! The FB page is wonderful, but these prompts and the unity that comes from the weekly topics... mmmm, nothing like it! So glad we're all back!

The past year has seen some severe ups and downs to my church. LOTS of changes have been made, and while not all of them have been easy, they've all been for the better, I think. As it frequently happens, changes in structure resulted in changes of population. My church family has shrunk a bit, and while I'm still in community with people, the number of "legs on the ground" part of church ministry has dramatically decreased.

While I serve in the church's nursery, what I really want to do is continue to host Jesus Feminist Book Club meetings. We met twice over the summer {the first time was when my neighbor caught his car on fire}, and both times the conversation has been so, so rich and good. The atmosphere at my church is changing, and I want to continue to be a part of the change, both with Book Club and in other conversations.

The "supplement" church, my other church body, has several great ministry opportunities, and while I can't be as involved as I'd like {thank you, rush hour traffic}, I'm looking for ways to join with them. This church has a fantastic Post-College & Early Career group, and I'm excited to start participating as I'm able.

Outside of my church body, I'm volunteering every week at CareNet Pregnancy and Family Services. I love my center! The ladies who work/volunteer there are awesome. Our little community is fantastic.

This Sunday, I will start volunteering as a baby cuddler in the NICU. I'm really excited about this, because even though I started the training process in April, the NICU cuddling only started September 1st. I'm looking forward to serving families who are going through a rough time, and of course I'm excited to hold babies!

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Thanks for joining! Be sure to visit Jen at Jumping in Puddles and Morgan at Follow and Believe for the link-up and for future prompts.