Finish This: Week Thirty-seven

Joining the Finish This party! Our lovely hostesses are Jen from The Arizona Russums, Nicole from Three 31, Lisa from Coastlined, and Becky from The Java Mama.

I am the type of person who always has a to-do list going and will call it a fantastic day when everything gets crossed off. My day planner is filled with lists of errands to run, phone calls to make, and Zumba classes, and at the end of the day, I draw bold lines through everything! And if I didn't finish something, I leave it unscathed and get to it later, no biggie. That's why I have a list - so I remember what I haven't done yet.

My favorite joke or riddle or funny is probably a little too dirty for this little blog, so I will share a couple G-rated favorites:

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All that really matters is:

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Hugo nails it: God is faithful, and we always have hope. 

Thanks for reading! Come back next week for another round of prompts, and if you want to participate, you can "finish this" in the comments or in your own blog post. 

Funny Friday - Family Edition

As promised, here are two funny stories for your viewing pleasure. One is a bit of a throwback, and the other was a phone call earlier this week. Enjoy!

My Sister, the Pyromaniac

My family has this long-running joke about Sister J being a pyromaniac, or "pyro" for those of you who abbrieve :) The origin of this endearing nickname is a story from long, long ago. I don't think any of my sisters were in double-digits, but we were certainly old enough to help set the table for dinner.

My mom always has a pretty centerpiece on the table - usually flowers or a plant - and on this occasion, the flowers were flanked by two tall candles. For some reason, my pyro sister wanted to light the candles for a romantic dinner...with the entire family. I'm actually not sure why she wanted the candles lit, but Mom humored her and told her how to strike the match and light the candles without burning herself.

**Note: Sister J is now a mature young lady with a healthy respect and admiration for candles, matches, and flames in general. She also has a clean record. End note.

J probably used three or four matches to actually create a flame, so she was a bit flustered. Mom offered to help, but J was determined to accomplish this feat on her own. After lighting a match, however, the candles were stubbornly not lighting. I think the wick had wax on it or something; anyway, it took another couple matches to light the darn things. Finally, success! The candles were lit, and the ambiance was set.

Mission accomplished, J blew out the match. Without turning her head. So the candle she had just struggled to light was now blown out also.

Sister J learned a valuable lesson that night. What that lesson is, I don't know. I personally leave the pyro to the pyromaniac of the fam.

Grandpa & Greek Yogurt

Earlier this week I called my grandparents {you know, the ones who live in the Frozen Tundra} and was talking to Grandpa. To refresh your memory, this is the grandpa who told me "Grammie won't go fishing with me anymore...I made her be the anchor one time, and now she won't go with me!" That Grandpa.

Me: Grandpa, tell Grammie that I'm still enjoying Noosa yogurt!
Grandpa: She just had to throw one out the other day.
Me: Uh oh. What for?
Grandpa: It expired before she got to it.
Me: Well, why didn't you help her eat it?
Grandpa: I don't care for that stuff.
Me: I guess if this is the first one that she's had to throw out, that's not too bad.
Grandpa: Yeah, she's been eating it since you lived with us, but I don't think she looks any more Greek.

And that, friends, is Funny Friday. Enjoy your weekend!

Funny Friday...on Tuesday

There is a method to this madness: I'm going out of town this weekend, so the odds of a Funny Friday post on Friday are basically nonexistent. But at least you get a laugh, and who doesn't need a laugh on Tuesday?!

So I'm heading to my Other Home tomorrow, partially to work and partially to play. It's going to be a fast, crazy trip.

My bosom friend AJ puts on the VBS skit each year, and this year the group needs medieval costumes. Coincidentally, my family has approximately half a million medieval costumes...ok, more like half a dozen, but try and put that bag of half a dozen costumes back into the closet and it turns into half a million. But this is a side note.

The point of this story is that I volunteered these costumes for AJ. She needs a knight, a monk, and a princess costume- check, check, and check.

It makes the most sense for me to pack these costumes and bring them with me on this trip; saves on postage, right? Right. So I'm packing my stuff last night {I know, I'm an eager beaver...ps, are beavers really that eager, or do people just say that because it rhymes? Like awesome possum? I've never met a possum that was truly awesome...but I guess they are awesome at playing dead...I've been on allergy meds for the past 48 hours- can you tell??} and even with my mad packing skills, I was apprehensive about fitting everything into my carry-on suitcase.

Suddenly, I had a BRILLIANT idea: I should wear the monk costume on the plane! So much space would be saved, both from not having this multi-layered brown frock in my suitcase, and from the clothes I wouldn't have to wear on the plane. I know. I'm a genius.

The best part of this story is telling AJ my plan.

I text her: great idea! I'm going to wear the monk's costume on the plane!
She texts back: You're going to get arrested.

Now, we are not discriminating against monks. Not at all. And I don't think TSA does either. In fact, I shared a plane with two Hindu {I think} monks on my way home from Texas. {This sparked another conversation with AJ about these monks' lunch boxes, which will be saved for another time.}

What might be odd or arrest-worthy is the fact that there are no girl monks...those are called nuns in the Catholic religion, and I don't know what they are in other faiths.

Oh. My. Word. I have a nun costume. And if I wore it, I would be a flying nun. Shut the front door.

                                                                         source

Too bad AJ doesn't need a nun costume. Guess I'll just stick everything in my suitcase and wear normal, non-monk or -nun clothing. Darn.

Wacky {or Weed} Wednesday

My co-worker L is forever teasing me about being from a state that just legalized marijuana. Whenever I mention baking something, like the cake we made for her dad's birthday, she says something about brownies. You know. The "special" brownies.

Well today she was giving me crap about smoking weed, and I finally let out a sarcastic "I'm not a smoker...I'm a baker!" And that got her started again. Here's what she says I should say:

"Since my state legalized marijuana, I'm thinking that listing 'baking' as one of my hobbies is no longer a good idea."

What to do with this girl!?